Stayed 2 nights and can honestly say that I had a better sleep at the Travelodge the night previous to my 2 at Cranage.
First impressions were fantastic, lovely looking old building (but the accommodation is bolted onto the back to make it a quadrangle that leaves you completely disorientated when getting around from room to dining room to conference room etc).
Very impressed at the bowls of fresh fruit (and tasty looking biccies) places around the venue, the food was absolutely delicious and the healthy options were actually properly healthy. A serious 11 out of 10 in the food stakes. Table water tasted of chlorine, a known issue with the hotel’s water but it’s apparently safe to drink. We were very quickly brought bottled still water when we mentioned the strange taste.
Room was mediocre, kind of 90s modern-ish and clean on first look (grime in bathroom corners and bath edge and dirty patches on bed throw). The bath was slightly shorter than the length of my legs which made for interesting bathing - never in my life have I seen a bath so short!
There was no decaf coffee in the room (pretty standard to have this in the 21st century I thought) but some was brought for me when I asked.
The really bad stuff:
175ml glass of Chardonnay - £7.35!!!!!!!!!! Diet coke - £3.60!!!!!!
Walls between the rooms must be skimmed single breeze block as you can hear EVERYTHING people do in the next door rooms – snoring, bathroom noises from all and sundry as the plumbing from floors above seem to go through the headboard wall, plugs being plugged in sounds like someone breaking into the room, lightswitches can even be heard being switched. The closers on the doors coupled with thin walls mean you hear every door in the place bang when people let them shut. I think I had around 4 hours sleep each night between the last lot of loo flushes/showers at around 2am to the first lot of loo flushes and hairdryer plugs going in at 6am.
Other members of our party were also treated to some entertaining intimate choruses and the sounds of some thug hitting his “girlfriend”, which hotel security had no idea how to handle when called due to concerns over the poor woman’s safety.
I returned to my room on day 2 to find it had been locked in the open position and anyone could have walked in. Several others along the corridor were also locked open but there was nobody keeping an eye on any of them. Housekeeping were around somewhere as there were supplies further along the corridor, but anyone could have got into my room and taken around £1.5k worth of my items within minutes. A few minutes later I returned to the corridor to look for someone and a shocked looking Domestic appeared. I had words about the room being left open and received an apology, but that wouldn’t have been enough had my valuables been stolen. Don’t tell me to use the safe! Apart from the fact that not all hotels have safes & your belongings should be safe if left in a LOCKED hotel room, I’ve also had a VERY unfortunate experience with malfunctioning hotel safes recently and will NEVER trust them again!
I’m sure it’s a wonderful wedding venue when people are too drunk to care about bar prices and pass out hence not noticing noisy rooms, but not for me I’m afraid.
- Cranage Hall Hotel
- Hall Hotel Cranage
