The hotel is horrifying. The rooms are very unclean, I slept on my towel. The bathroom was the living room of two cockroaches (the madeira ones are about 5cm!!!).. never go there!

The "Monte Carlo" is excellent value for money, we booked a dead-cheap room with EasyJet and we expected the worst. How positively surprised we were when we saw the hotel! Although it has clearly seen better times (we believe it must have been the top-place of Funchal in the 1920s) it is a lovely place full of character, very close to Funchal's town centre. The place is super clean and staff are generally very helpful. They have parking space which is limited but they have a funny but effective system to make full use of it - see yourself ;-) We can certainly recommend the place!

This late 19th century hotel with a modern extension and pool, really does fit the description 'faded grandeur'. It has character and unlike the main drag of hotels in western Funchal is perched up the hill (good exercise!) and the view from our room (14 - in the old buiding) gave us a 180' view across Funchal. It was a large airy room with high ceilings and a very comfortable bed. Breakfasts have been critisised in other reviews but it was a typical continental breakfast found all over Europe! The bar is a great place to linger over a drink on return from an evening meal and sample one of the speciality drinks made by Ricardo or Marco and chat to other guests on the terrrace looking at the twinkling lights of Funchal.
We used our hire car to explore the island comprehensively and had to admire the brilliant efforts to clear up the dreadful deveastation caused by the floods in February. There is plenty of evidence of that day once you leave the town but nearly all roads were open, though care was needed in some places.
Simple directions on getting there from the airport. Leave the expressway at Junction 11 - follow the road downhill, past the roundabout and continue downhill (the road is now a dual carriageway with the river between) past 2 petrol stations built on bridges over the riverand turn right at the Opel Car showroom traffic lights. Follow the road round to the right and up hill. There is a sharp left turn and then right and then you have to take the next right as ahead is a No Entry - 150m ahead is the hotel.
Ricardo in particular was a brilliant source of information, especially on how to get to places - signposts are not very helpful on the island (especially to get to Monte at present) and he was so helpful when one of us was unwell. He is also a great raconteur!
If you dislike the modern multi roomed hotels that exist all over the world with little difference between them, and enjoy exploring to find a restaurant for lunch or evening meal then the monte Carlo is for you.

We booked B & B for a week with seaview. On arrival an English staff member ushered us into a grim damp room in the annexe which opened onto a small yard. A Tiny bathroom,toilet inches away from bath with very unpleasant bathmat. We were told that their computer did not record us as having breakfast and we would have to pay another 14 euros day. After pointing out that there was no plug to fit sink and both sides of the bed were dirty and cobwebby, we were offered another room by which time I had gone to bed in despair. Bedsheets were clean but smelt of the damp. Next day new room had seaview, TV, no damp, decent bathroom and no dirt. Full marks to very helpful madeiran staff. Took three days before Travel Agent phoned hotel and they agreed it was an error we were entitled to breakfast. Stressful.
Breakfast is usually something to look forward to.Cornflakes were stale...Juice watered down. Forget it.
Our previous stay in this lovely town was 2009 in a super hotel further out near Lido. We are not a difficult to please couple but this is not a 3* standard hotel.
Funchal is a lovely town, Madeira is a lovely island and the people are friendly but our unfortunate experience overshadowed the whole week.
Our thoughts are with all the struggling local people in their efforts to clear up after the catastrophe of recent events.