When it comes to holidays this is the epitome of a waste of my time.
For starters, when we arrived at the signature 4.8 stars hotel (Grupotel Cala san Vicente) we thought, what a marvellous work of art for such a bargain, we are amazed.
Until you walk through the front door, it was barren absolutely nobody with in a five mile radius of the place.
After about 20 minutes standing the cold, the manager came into the viewing spectrum…. With his pyjamas strapped around his skinny rib cage.
When we arrived at the door of our room their was a distinct smell of potent droppings to our surprise we opened the door only to find some smelly cat cushioned upon our tatty bed sheets, the cat has grease spewing from every hair.
So we again stormed to the desk demanding to change rooms but have a guess what… there was nobody their.
We eventually were immediately moved to the elegant on sweet with a mini bar and a vending machine.. We were delighted.
When we went outside we were greeted by the most hideous creature you could ever see.
I cannot describe this image because this is a family website.
Onwards I go towards the ever growing danger of criminal:
I went out to the buffet located in the luxury dining area, to get some breakfast even though I am 25 this was not suitable for even my easy to please children.
The buffet included a mixture of raw eel soup, cornflakes and a pitiful excuse for an English brunch.
When I swiftly glided to my master bedroom I noticed my door was partially open so I walked with caution to the door only to find silence, but I hastily role called my personal items such as my makeup, hair dryer, passport and various items.
As I recalled my valuables I suddenly noticed “where is my passport” as you can imagine I once again rushed to the front desk, the manger was informed by the police to check the CCTV but sadly they could not identify the criminal.
None the less I am still in Ibiza enjoying the rest of my vacation from hell.
p.s don’t go unless for an idiot
